When we think about change of seasons in the natural what comes to mind for most of us are the climatically related seasons of winter, summer, spring, and fall. However, as many of us my already know, the seasons don’t change simply because of the months of the year we are in. The temperature variations we experience in the different season have a direct correlation to the location of the earth on its orbit or ration around the sun. The earth’s orbit around the sun is an elliptical or oval shape. Therefore, when the earth is approaching its closest proximity to the sun we experience spring and then summer. However, as the earth begins to move further away from the sun we have the seasons of fall and then winter. Therefore, the catalyst or trigger for the seasonal changes is the rotation and orbit of the earth around the sun and would not occur if this annual trip around the sun did not occur.
God’s original design of the family was for a man and woman to become one as husband and wife and then be fruitful and multiply (Genesis 1:27-28 & 2:24). As we know all too well, God’s original definition of the family has been corrupted, perverted, twisted, and torn, by man in our attempt to redefine the family to suit our carnal needs. Today a very large percentage of kids are in single family households, which statistically make sense considering as much as fifty percent of all marriages end in divorce and the many children born out of wedlock. God being the creator of all things had a reason for designing the family in manner He did because He knew that the ideal environment to raise children is with both mother and father in position and operating accordingly. The intention of this lesson is not to make anyone feel bad or guilty about whatever situation we may find ourselves in but to bring enlightenment about the roles some of us will have to operate in that is not natural to us.
God made women to be nurturers and as mothers their role is nurture the children especially when they are really young. God also made women to be emotional in nature, which also plays a strong role in how they interact and respond to their children. On the other hand, God made men to be providers and protectors; both from a natural and spiritual perspective. God also made men to be more logical in nature and less emotional. Ideally, God made man and woman to be perfect compliments of one another when we are operating respectfully in our roles.
Unfortunately, today we have far too many single parent homes with mom being the single parent in the majority of the instances. Therefore, we have moms doing what they know how to do which is to be a nurturing mom. However, as our children grow older, especially our boys, there are some seasons that are being missed because the catalyst to bring about the change is missing.
There are ton of discussions about why are our young men so weak and irresponsible. The answer to this question in most cases is simple. Mom, continued to nurture but when the time came for dad to intervene, he wasn’t there! In a family where dad is operating in his role, once the kids start reaching a certain age, he begins to intervene on how to deal with the kids in varying situations and circumstances. The dad begins to cut off the level of nurturing and emotional responses that might come from mom and deal with the kids from a more logical perspective. Dad, becomes that catalyst to say okay, enough of all the baby stuff, let’s start dealing with the kids in a manner that prepares them to become more independent.
Ephesians 6:4 (NKJV) - And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord.
This by no means undermines the wonderful job so many single moms have done with their kids. However, a lot of the change that need to occur in the appropriate season of our children’s up bringing do not occur because the trigger for change that is the role God gave to dads is never pulled. Thus, we expect our boys to become men when they have missed many critical life changing seasons. Without the proper trigger or catalyst our sons will not instantly become men once they reach eighteen, no more than it will automatically become cold simply because we are in the month of December if the earth isn’t moving further away from the sun.
The bottom line is our children need both of their parents. Those of you who are in the position where the other parents is not a functional option for whatever reason, please understand that you have to be even more sensitive to the season changes in your children’s lives. While this lesson tended to be my son/boy centric, our daughters also need both of their parents as well. However, a single mom is more naturally equipped to raise a daughter on her own than a son. Some of you mothers have been wondering what missing from your children’s lives that would catapult them to the next level/season of their lives. The answer to that question for many young men and women is that catalyst of being affirmed by a father or a father figure.
